Posts from June 2006

Maybe I am obsessed with dead pop stars but I agree with the sentiment of this blog (skip the comments).

A long day tuning SQL queries using Siebel 7.8 and Oracle 10gR2...

We used the Siebel recommended settings (TechNote 582). We used the Oracle recommended settings.

We gathered table statistics.

We gathered index statistics.

We gathered column histograms.

We dropped statistics on empty tables (Alert 1162).

We set some miscellaneous (magic) underscore parameters to encourage CBO to use the correct index.

We poured over 10053 trace files.

We used a 15 year old, deprecated, desupported optimizer technology to reduce a complex 27 table (outer) join query with a subquery to subsecond from an hourglass.

We opened an SR with Oracle Technical Support.

We opened an SR with Siebel Technical Support.

We used a stored outline.

We went home.

So farewell then, Graham Poll.

Your lifelong dream of officiating in the World Cup final is dead.

However, you only have yourself to blame. Counting the number of yellow cards awarded and to whom is a fundamental part of your job and you failed.

In August 2002, I visited Florida on holiday. In return for what seemed like 7 successive days at theme parks in sweltering weather, my family kindly allowed me a visit to the Kennedy Space Center which was a fantastic day out.

As luck would have it, a shuttle launch was actually scheduled during our stay so I planned to drive out to the highway to watch it. Unfortunately, the initial launch was postponed due to inclement weather conditions so I sporadically checked the TV and radio for the rearranged launch date and time.

One afternoon, I returned to the car and turned the radio on. I was disappointed to hear that the shuttle had just launched. However, what was infuriating was that I was only located a few miles away from KSC and missed a once in a lifetime opportunity because I was, err, shopping.

So, at the precise moment the space shuttle was blasting off into outer space, I was traipsing around Wal-Mart, for reasons that now escape me, hunting for a Phillips screwdriver, a pair of nail scissors and 4 AAA batteries.

Poor old Spain. After their fans roundly booed the French anthem, I was almost rooting for them to prevail over France last night. However, I dont like Luis Aragones. I think he is an arrogant racist so I was quite pleased that France beat them. Well, no, hang on a minute, actually no I wasn't that pleased because I also think Thierry Henry is an arrogant cheat.

Let's just hope Brazil beat France on Saturday.

One of the things I like about WordPress is the sense of community. Wordpress users (and developers) willingly help each other out on the support forums. There is also a FAQ with useful information for newcomers and experienced users alike.

You can find similar, related WordPress blogs of interest usings tags and you can also discover new material by examining the league tables of the most popular WordPress blogs, individual articles and the fastest growing blogs over on botd.wordpress.com.

So, imagine my surprise when I saw this humble blog nestling at No. 38 in the list of ‘Fastest Growing Blogs’.

My life is now complete. Almost.

On Monday, I received two DVDs (Ascension) containing 225 minutes from some of the last shows by The Chameleons in San Francisco from October 2002.

Great songs, great lyrics, great artwork. Fantastic. Absolutely fantastic.

PS. Don't bother commenting that this contravenes rule 3. I know.

On Friday, I saw the massive Rooney crucifixion poster on the westbound M4 in Brentford near the GSK offices.

I think the Nike creative is an interesting use of religious imagery. Deliberately provocative but much better than the unimaginative, banal media advertising we normally see in the UK although my wife was heard to mutter 'Ugly man, ugly face, ugly poster'.

Collin from that esteemed, well respected publication The Blog Review was kind enough to review this humble blog and raised the thorny question of an 'About' page. The absence of an 'About' page is one of Collin's pet hates and Lorelle also thinks they are very important.

While I agree that background information about the author may be interesting and contact details may be useful for establishing dialog that isn't suited for comments, I don't think that the lack of an 'About' page is necessarily a habit of an ineffectual blogger.

For example, let's build my new, shiny 'About' page by answering Lorelle's probing questions:

Who are you ? Norman Brightside (clearly a synonym so what's the point)

What do you do ? I am a technical consultant for Oracle Corporation and try to help people use Siebel and Oracle (read books) more effectively.

What are you talking about ? Look at my Categories or scan the archives. Funnily enough, customers often ask me the same question.

What will you be talking about ? Most likely the same subjects as I have talked about in the past. Subscribe to the feed if you care that much.

What gives you the right to talk about anything ? Absolutely nothing. This is purely my wooden crate in the corner of Hyde Park.

What are you doing here ? What do you mean - you weren't expecting me until tomorrow and there's no desk and computer for me.

Why are you doing it here ? Because publishing a book takes time and money.

Who the hell are you ? Now, now. Language, Lorelle.

And a couple of questions of my own:

Where are you ? London, near England. How can I contact you ? Comment. I can see your email address but no-one else can.

Someone in my family was lucky enough to receive a Sony PSP over the weekend. The Sony PSP is a fun device. The PSP can play music. The PSP can surf the Internet. The PSP can even view photos and DVDs. The PSP is also pretty good as a games console apparently.

The PSP is attractively styled in black although, bizarrely, my model came with a hideous white strap and incongruous white earphones.

I connected the PSP to my wireless network and to my amazement, it worked first time so I was able to upgrade the PSP software using 'Network Update'.

However, Web browsing is tortuous as entering text is pretty slow but the quality of the display is excellent.

Oh and the lucky person wasn't me.