To the good people who were searching for answers and somehow blundered onto my blog, here is my considered response.

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Sorry but please stay behind after class and write out 100 times ‘There is simply no excuse’. However, I sincerely hope you did indeed try your luck with my suggestion and would dearly love to know the outcome.

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Hmm. Don’t tell me you turned off at half-time too ?

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Unconfirmed but I would love it, absolutely love it.

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Ask at the hotel desk. Tell them you have an important football match to watch.

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Sorry but WordPress tantalisingly truncated your question. See also ‘statspack truncated SQL query text’.

PAUL SCHOLES WIFE

Naughty. And stop shouting.

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Eat yourself fitter.

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IP address divulged to UK security services. Sorry but I am not a member of the ‘We are not afraid’ cult.

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Eh ? Seek help.

Best marketing campaigns ever

Well - did you agree with my verdict ?

new MOT test joke

Come on. I am holding my sides in anticipation.

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You see. There are people out there who blog about Persian cats.

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Tsk. Tsk.

accumulator principle

I hate to disappoint you but the only person getting rich from this program is the mentor.

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Oh come on, Janet. Surely you can afford 10 GBP to get my email address.

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Don’t bother. Use ‘spreport.sql’.