After my recent holiday, I have been sent on the road for two weeks. I am currently staying at the (heinously overpriced) Malmaison hotel in Oxford.

This place is very expensive and seems like a gaol for the vertically challenged. You emerge from reception into a prison wing. If you are over 5’ 8’’ tall, you are forced to duck under the door to enter your room.

Oxford is not car friendly. That is why you have to pay £20 to park your vehicle.

Watched Manchester United beat Sheffield United 2-0 at the Market Tavern hostelry.

The Market Tavern is a curious mix of pretentious Oxford students, dressed in shorts and flip-flops, discussing philosophy contrasted with threatening, tattooed hard-cases from the Blackbird Leas estate.

I feared for my life until I spotted the referee of the inevitable battle who was heavily tattooed but also sported khaki shorts and flip-flops.

A band was simultaneously playing (practicing ?) upstairs. They had more fans then Sheffield United and played a curious mix of blues and indie rock-n-roll until an ill-advised cover of ‘Never Mind’ forced their 23 female groupies to depart en-masse for McDonalds.