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Michael Essien

For the most part, unsung and largely unnoticed at Chelsea. Simply outstanding for Ghana against high quality opposition (Italy) yesterday. Continually in the action, absolutely everywhere, superb fitness levels, great tackler, decent passer, suspect temperament.

Essien is the tailor-made replacement for Roy Keane. United fans can only hope Ballack’s arrival puts Essien on the bench or in the reserves and that he won’t just sit there and take the money (cf. SWP).

different perspective

A superb photograph of England’s (own) goal in the World Cup opener versus Paraguay.

so farewell then, Roy Keane

I don’t think I could have a higher opinion of any footballer than I already had of the Irishman, but he rose even further in my estimation at the Stadio Delle Alpi. The minute he was booked and out of the final he seemed to redouble his efforts to get the team there. It was the most emphatic display of selflessness I have seen on a football field. Pounding over every blade of grass, competing if he would rather die of exhaustion than lose he inspired all around him. I felt it was an honour to be associated with such a player.'

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don't mention the war

‘I am really sorry that we have 125 German tourists staying in the hotel.’

The waitress actually meant ‘Sorry for the delay but we have…’ but it still reminded me of Fawlty Towers and raised a smile

World Cup dispatches from embedded reporter

Psst. I have managed to beat the banning order and have now safely arrived in Stockholm (near Sweden). I evaded the hordes of police spotters at Heathrow by checking in immediately behind a screaming infant with a glum face (me not the baby). I also sported a linen jacket and a laptop to complete my cunning disguise.

I was proudly telling a group of German ladies from Munich (World Cup widows) of my escapades in the confines of the hotel lift. There was a lengthy pause and they all looked really interested (or perplexed) until a Deutsche Fraulein uttered:

helping people read books

Someone recently asked me at a dinner party: ‘So, Norman, tell me what you do in life ?’. I spontaneously replied: ‘I help people read books’. The lady (for it was a she) exclaimed: ‘Oh how absolutely fabulous. You are a teacher’. ‘Err, well, no. I actually work in IT’. ‘Oh I see. You work in training. Why didn’t you just say so ?’ ‘Err, well no. I am a sort of IT consultant’.

WordPress import/export

Maybe a fraction too late for Doug Burns (whose Blogger blog has been recently hijacked) but WordPress have just announced the availability of XML import/export utilities, primarily for switching between self-hosted and WordPress.com blogs but may also be useful for backing up your blog and facilitating other platform migrations.

Tempting, very tempting

screaming babies

Another criteria for the inverse law of airports. The strange thing is, you are most susceptible and sensitive to a screaming, inconsolable baby when you don’t possess any yourself.

However, when you are a (recent) parent, you are too consumed with guilt and embarrassment to even care what other people think.

Or, if you are an (experienced) parent, travelling abroad on business, you tend to side with Frank Skinner, who memorably said:

inverse law of airports

The larger the airport, the longer it takes to drive there, check in, clear security, order a sandwich, find a seat in the lounge, secure a taxi.

In my limited experience, Heathrow Terminal 3 is pretty poor. Some small, anonymous airfield in Switzerland is the best. You pick up your own bags from the runway, walk to an empty terminal building and you even get to stamp your own passport.

worry ye not

My mailbox is bulging with letters from recent and occasional visitors worried that they may have missed some WordPress themes in the recent blitzkrieg of posts during the ongoing and exciting Theme rotation policy.

Worry ye not. I am meticulously capturing screen dumps of each theme in a Flickr photoset so the poll will be absolutely fair and equitable (and Regulus will win).

The current theme is Banana Smoothie. I wonder if coffee enthusiast and cocktail maker, Jon Emmons, might be voting for this one.