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dumb, captive animals at Australia zoo

I’m not a big fan of zoos but in Brisbane, we visited Australia Zoo as it had beenrecommended by a few people. Also, we were keen to see some native Australian wildlife during our stay.

I also assumed that Steve Irwin would ensure that the animals were kept in a natural and humane environment. We all enjoyed the day out. We saw crocodiles snapping at a white bucket, the kids fed pellets to kangaroos and wallabies and we cuddled sleepy koalas. We also saw dingos, echidnas, possums, macaws, snakes, wombats, turtles, tigers and the world famous Australian elephant (shurely shome mistake here - Ed).

the month that never was

Since I started this blog almost four years ago, I have posted every month. Until last month - July 2009.

To accentuate the radio silence effect, this blog was also completely offline for the latter two weeks of July 2009 (PHP/FastCGI configuration problem at Bluehost).

holiday statistics

Just got back from three weeks in Australia visiting family and friends.

• Countries: 3 (England, Singapore, Australia)
• Cities: 7 (Singapore, Brisbane, Hamilton Island, Perth, Broome, Kununurra, Darwin)
• Red rock formations: Too many to mention
• Best airport: Singapore - free gadget recharging points and Internet access
• Worst airport: LHR T4 - building site, long queues, surly staff
• Wildlife: Kangaroos, wallabies, crocodiles, spiders and, err, terrifying budgerigars
• States: 3 (QLD, WA, NT)
• Flights: 11
• Airlines: 2 (Quantas, JetStar)
• Miles: 26,341
• Music: ‘These wooden ideas’ - Idlewild
• Newspapers: Zero

where will it all end ?

Last year, I found an ancient 56Kb dialup modem lurking in a cupboard. I fondly remembered the days of dangling the extension cable diagonally across the bedroom floor (which often tripped unsuspecting visitors up) and mentally replayed the connection tone.

And now Virgin Media announce 50Mb for £28.

Manchester City's title winning lineup

Exclusive - the Manchester City 2009-2010 Premiership winning lineup in full.

• Goalkeeper - Given
• Defence - Dunne, Richards
• Midfield - Barry, Ireland
• Attack - Tevez, Robinho, Adebayor, Santa Cruz, Wright-Phillips, Bellamy

Anyone spot the deliberate mistake ?

grunting at Wimbledon

Sorry but I just can’t help myself.

The Fall - Kentish Town Forum (10/6/09)

John Cooper Clarke recited punk poetry while The Buzzcocks performed some punk karaoke but the real stars of the show were, inevitably, The Fall.

I just posted a brief review of the concert over on The Fall forum (blogging is so last year).

aftermath of flight AF447

I probably shouldn’t ask this question and watch a ‘CSI New York’ box set to find the answer but still…

Bodies are now being recovered from the fateful Air France flight 447 that crashed in the Atlantic ocean and the authorities are requesting DNA samples from relatives in order to identify the deceased.

So, what exactly does 7 days in sea water do to the human body ?

open letter to Bob Crowe

Dear Bob

Congratulations on disrupting the lives of millions of Londoners by calling a two day tube strike. Nice timing, by the way. An England international at Wembley and more importantly; The Fall, Buzzcocks and John Cooper Clarke live at Kentish Town.

Just a couple of quick questions before I set off:

• I would also like a 5% pay rise which would come in most handy in these tense, difficult times. Also, the prospect of a guaranteed final pension and a job for life is also very appealing. I am certainly capable of reading a Red/Green/Amber signal, moving a lever from ‘Stop’ to ‘Go’ while reading a copy of ‘The Sun’. Please email me if any vacancies come up.
• Obviously, I would like to show my whole hearted support for the RMT cause by hooting my (imaginary) horn and making a small financial contribution to the fighting fund. I will be passing though most of the mainline stations on my extended journey tonight so maybe you could picket there where the London commuting public can see you instead of hiding in your office car park - you cowardly bastards.

Your comrade, Norman.

if Carlsberg made typos

My two favourite typos of all time, which are guaranteed to bring a smile to my face, are:

• ‘Stationary Cupboard’
• ‘Principle Consultant’

Until yesterday when I received an invite to:

Date: 8 June 2009
Time: 16:30-17:00 (BST)
Location: G27
Subject: Warp up meeting

I opened the meeting with a summary of the day’s progress and my findings: ‘I have completed my analysis of Siebel performance, the Oracle configuration, the I/O infrastructure, the hardware specifications, application usage and my conclusion is as follows:’